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I'm really tired of trying to learn on the fly. It's not my style. I'm not the type who can tackle challenges head-on and figure them out with confidence - I'm the type who freaks out and questions herself and wastes time and flaaaaaaails. AARRRRRRGGGGH.

I should be drawing.. and not spouting about it on my stupid blog. Fuuuuuuuuck.

At least at the science factory I was productive. Sort of.

also: watched The Ramen Girl (possibly the worst movie I have ever seen, and that is definitely not a hyperbole) and all I could think was....

OH NOOO BRITTANY MURPHY WHAT DID YOU DO TO YOUR LIPS???

she looks like the offspring of pamela anderson and donald duck!

masturbator

I don't know why I have to always be contrarian. I was perfectly fine with bullshit art until I went to MICA. But it's all been totally thrown up in the air for some reason. Now I have this weird growing resentment against the whole thing.
Maybe it's me who's being pretentious, but as I dive deeper into the "art world" and art school and everything, the more I realize how much I hate art. Or rather, just fine art. It is completely pretentious and has no practical or applicable purpose... I don't know if this makes me a bad person but... I remember talking to someone in the beginning of the year and they told me 

"this might make me sound bad, but I just want to draw. I don't want to think deeply about my art, or help further the world, or meet a ton of new people, I just want to freaking draw. That's what I'm at this school for and that's all I'm going to do." 

And I think i'm slowly coming to that kind of realization. I'm just so sick of "art." I just can't bring myself to be into it... it all seems unbearably silly to me.. and to steal smarter peoples' words, completely masturbatory. 

Because really, deep down, who creates art without the intention of some people looking at it and praising it? 

but that's just me I guess. Art is therapeutic for some people, I just must not get it. 

Lol.

Hahaha.

http://www.youtube.com/user/Alphacat

The spoof of T.I - Whatever you like is probably the best.

Ego

This is why I almost never listen to the radio anymore. 

yiiiiiikes.

And this: 

But this is why I dooo go on youtube.